Babies Escape

I've decided to show how kids escape from their barriers.  Khalill hasn't started as yet but this was interested to view.

Ten Things I Hate About Being Pregnant

Being Pregnant and having friends that are pregnant as well I thought that would have been a great experience for all of us.  In my case, the experience was terrible for majority of the time while pregnant. Below I've listed the top ten things that drove me crazy.

I bled for three whole months. Yes, it’s true! I noticed around week nine that I had spotting on my underwear.  I was scared and prayed so hard to my God asking him please don’t let me lose this child.  The doctor did an emergency ultrasound and found that my son was doing well and explained that some females go through their entire pregnancy experiencing this.  Not soon after, I started seeing heavy blood clots and was sent to do another ultrasound that showed that Khalill is developing well and did not affect me.  This lasted for three months and I couldn’t be any happier when it finally stopped.

Nausea and Vomiting. I went through my entire pregnancy throwing up.  Not one day past and I didn’t feel like I had to run to the bathroom to throw up.  Initially, the vomiting was so bad that I ended up in the emergency room because I couldn’t walk properly.  I was told that I had strained a muscle in my back from the consistent vomiting.  I was  given crotch stick to walk with because the pain was unbearable. 

Restless nights.  I got limited rest while pregnant with my son.  As soon as I was out is as soon as my body started feeling like some foreign object has evaded it and wanted to make it it’s own.  Khalill moved more at nights than how he did during the day and that kept waking me up.  I eventually found a remedy for him though.  I noticed that when I lay my warm lavender rice bag on my stomach, that was when he would relax and let me rest. That didn’t stay warm for too long and as soon as it wore off, he was at it kicking and stretching and driving me crazy all over again.

Heartburns / Acid Reflux.  This was the absolute low point in my pregnancy.  The heartburn started around week 34 and it kept coming.  Everything I ate gave me gas and not only that; it gave me bad heartburn.  They recommended sucking on tums and that didn’t help.  One Saturday I cried so hard, I felt like I was going to die.  The pain was so unbearable.  I had gone to see my doctor before and got a prescription for something that actually worked a miracle.

Bigger Boobs. Around week 12, I started seeing the size boobs that I always wanted and was fascinated with them.  Fast forward about twenty weeks later and I absolutely hate them.  They were too big and too heavy and my once perfect boobs now are imperfect.  I still hate them up to today.

I was very emotional. I hated the fact that everyone kept telling that I was emotional because of I was pregnant.  Even when I had a valid point, no one saw it because I was just getting upset because I’m going through the motions of being pregnant.  Needless to say, I threw a couple, well maybe a lot of tantrums.

The restroom became my best-friend.  I had the urge to urinate constantly.  I mean every ten to fifteen minutes I needed to visit the rest room.  I had to empty my bladder very often and this too made an impression on my sleepless nights. I couldn’t hold it because I always felt like I was going to explode.

I could no longer experience an impromptu sneeze or have a healthy laugh without urinating myself.  I peed on myself a couple times throughout this process due to sneezing and excess laughing.  I eventually started wearing Always Leak Guard to help keep me from making a mess on myself.

Feeling jealous of my friend.  My friend had a smooth pregnancy and I was jealous.  One had no morning sickness and another hardly gained any weight.  They slept well for most of the time and I kept complaining about what I’m going through.

The inability to get my shoes on.  I was pregnant right throughout the winter season so I had to wear winter boots.  It was a task and a half every single day to get on my socks and to put on my boots to walk in the snow.

BEING A WORKING MOM

I had been given three months of maternity leave and the end was drawing near. I had just began to enjoy the role of motherhood but had to make the toughest decision in going back to work. I felt guilty leaving my child, Khalill, so young but feeling guilty won’t help. After all, he was going to be under the care of my mom while his dad and I are at work.  However, this didn’t stop me from feeling devastated and I never knew how hard a transition it would be for a life as a WORKING MOM.

Like any other new moms returning to work after a maternity leave made me felt unraveled of my contradictory roles; being the best mom I could be and also providing for my new bundle of joy.

 I remembered crying on my first day back to work thinking of the distress and agony of leaving my son, my treasure - Khalill Treasure. More so, I had not yet adjusted to the working hours thus far or being custom to an 8am deadline. I was still exhausted from my nightly routines, being up through the night breastfeeding or just to cater to his needs.

While being back at work, sometimes I felt like my best wasn’t enough.  Deprivation of sleep was my biggest factor.  It impaired my thoughts, attentiveness, concentration and problem solving skills.  I came across moments when I told myself “I can't do this” or “I’m too tired” as I was handed dead end assignments with a limited deadline, which seemed evenly strenuous to my schedule as a working mom.

Being a mom was my first job and a great girlfriend, the office was my second. After leaving the office, I had to tend to my third.  This included picking my son from my mom if his dad wasn’t able to get him and be inclined to prepare dinner for my family and face a heap of laundry that needed to fold  and put away during the week.

Dealing with all these duties can be overwhelming and make you wonder if you are doing your best as a mother and have a concern for your child. Is my absence affecting his growth?

Nevertheless, I became to know my priorities, and that was to cut myself some slack. When I was at work, I made it my main concern to give my outmost best and rely on my confident childcare arrangements to do a good job in my 8 hours absence.  I have decided not to make a big deal out of a not so clean (spic-n-span) home or a perfect dinner every night.